A REPORT from Kaspersky Lab into how familiar people have become with their smartphones has brought us the story of a man who went to Las Vegas and married not a showgirl, but a bloody mobile phone.
What happens in Vegas should stay in Vegas, so we would have been happy not to hear the news of Aaron Chervenak and his bride. Even Kaspersky is surprised and took to researching it with the universities of Wurzburg and Nottingham Trent.
The research found that a quarter of people ranked their smartphone as more or equally important to them as their parents. Which is nice, particularly if those parents are paying the bill for the phone in question. One in five respondents rate their phone as better, or on a level with, their partner, and 16 per cent value their phone over themselves.
This is terrible stuff. The smartphone is handy for sure, but is it really that ace? Kaspersky already has worries in this area, and blames phones for a kind of digital amnesia.
This new research found that just over one per cent of people rated their phone above anything else in their world. Around a third would dump their friends in favour of a night sitting and staring and clicking.
Compounding the midnight madness, 93 per cent of people who rated their parents against a phone said that they would happily hand over their PIN when asked. We doubt that Chervenak would, but then who knows what goes on in that dude’s mind?
“Our phones are an integral part of our lives, and this study brings psychological proof of this. Our friend-like connection with our smartphones means that we place an incredible degree of trust in an inanimate object, so much so that we consider it a closer and more important element of our lives than many other people,” said Astrid Carolus, media psychologist at the University of Würzburg, as she sought to make sense of this madness.
“With this in mind, we were surprised to see that it was nevertheless very easy for us to get hold of smartphone PINs. We asked people to sit in a waiting room for a period of time, and then asked them for their body height and smartphone PIN.
“Without much hesitation the vast majority of people gave it to us. This is worrying, because it suggests that we are willing to put our digital friends – and the data they hold – at risk.”
Oh, the wedding video. You can see it below. Chervenak explains that he is fond of his phone, and an official performs the ceremony. A ring is attached to the device, and Chervenak promises to love and cherish it for the rest of his life.
So hang around him when it comes to upgrade time, as he’ll be giving them away. Unless it’s a spoof. µ